Building Your Self-Esteem Of course it's OK to have ups and downs in your feelings, but having low self-esteem isn't OK. Feeling like you're not important can make you sad and can keep you from trying new things. It can keep you from making friends or hurt how you do at work. Having strong self-esteem is also a very big part of growing up. As you get older and face tough decisions — especially under peer pressure — the more self-esteem you have, the better. It's important to know you're worth a lot.

If you think you might have low self-esteem, try talking to a friend or relative you trust about it. He or she may be able to help you come up with some good ideas for building your self-esteem. In the meantime, here are a few things that you can try to increase your self-esteem: Make a list of the stuff you're good at. It can be anything from drawing or singing to playing a sport or telling a good joke. If you're having trouble with your list, ask your friend or relative to help you with it. Then add a few things to the list that you'd like to be good at. Make a plan to work on those skills or talents. Give yourself three compliments every day. Don't just say, "I'm so great." Be specific about something good about yourself, like, "I was a good friend to Jill today" or "I did better on that test than I thought I would." While you're at it, before you go to bed every night, list three things in your day that really made you happy. Remember that your body is your own, no matter what shape, size, or color it is. If you are worried about your weight or size, you can check with your doctor to make sure that things are OK. Remind yourself of things about your body that are cool, like, "My legs are strong and I can skate really well."

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Remember that there are things about yourself you can't change. You should accept and love these things — such as skin color and shoe size — because they are part of you. When you hear negative comments in your head, tell yourself to stop. When you do this, you take the power away from the voice inside that discourages you. By focusing on the good things you do and all your great qualities, you learn to love and accept yourself — the main ingredients for strong self-esteem! Even if you've got room for improvement (and who doesn't?), realizing that you're valuable and important helps your self-esteem to shine.